It has happened.

Well it has happened. I am truly thinking of quitting science. There have been lots of tears of frustration, sadness, feelings of failure, but I think this is for real now. I don't have to tell you guys how hard it has been for me to make this decision but I think that the decision is pretty much settled.

What am I going to do with my life now you ask? Well, the truth is that I am not sure, but at the same time there is a little tiny part of myself thats actually excited about leaving and also about living my life.

Three years ago I didn't think that anything at all could stop me from completing a Ph.D. Now..... Well.... Lots of things have occurred. My mom never thought I should be in this career. There was always a part of me that doubted myself. I can't fight that doubt anymore. And I just can't be swimming against the current. I am exhausted and I want to live my life, not work my life away for absolutely nothing in return.

What am I taking with me? What did I get out of this? Well I have a Masters degree. I am not sure what else I got out of it. I think I am a much better presenter. But that question will be answered later on. One of the biggest fears I have is the possibility of becoming one of these women that just sit at home. But we all know I can't sit at home for long right? Maybe a week and then I'll definitely get out and do something. Oh well. Sigh. It is sad but it has happened. I am leaving. I give up. I am quitting. I bet some people are disappointed. I bet some others will be celebrating. But it doesn't matter, I am excited about finding a career in which I don't get tossed around like a rag doll and people accept me as I am.

See ya'll laters.