The "Bay Area"

If you are going to buy a place in California you might as well make a deal with the Devil so that he can get you a free pass to Heaven.
Obsiously the Devil wouldn't be the individual to consult on entries to Heaven. Well in the same way. You just don't come to LA or San Fran or oops "the Bay AREA" excuse me, to buy a home.

"A home? What? Why would you need that? Oh Jesus! Isn't that just Bad for Global warming?" Yes Bay Area People, this is what I think of you and your little over blown area.

I believe the first ultra polite thing they would say to me is, "Well if you do not like it why don't you just leave?" Instead of, Isa, let me show you the best thing about MY special area. Instead of I understand that housing here is crazy and it really isn't worth it but don't worry you'll find a place.
No, God forbid that you could be this nice understanding and helpful in "the BAY AREA"....

Well my answer to all of you "Bay Areans" is that I am STUCK IN YOUR STINCKING DIRTY HOLE!" ,because I am going to grad school here.
I mean I am not asking for much dammit. I am just asking for a place where I can sleep and live and study and be COMFORTABLE and not be paying 100 million dollars for it. And where I can take a decent crap without having to share the toilet with a stranger whom will charge me a quarter so that he can buy more CRACK!
The bay areans snicker at me when I talk about NYC. Well, let me tell you, in NYC I could pay for an apartment on my own, I could buy a home, I could go to cool restaurants of any kind. Whether that be Mexican, Puerto Rican, Vietnamese, Korean, whatever! But here all I find is Guacamole and Sushi, OOPS! I forgot that goes together.
My husband, whom has been waiting for the market to go below HELL so that prices here drop 1% is telling to say something positive about the marvelous, "Bay Area". Well here it is, at least there is an old long red bridge where you can throw yourself off of after foreclosing your home.
Then again there are many long bridges in New York and even in Florida, mind you not red.

Qual Fever

Well kitties, it has sure been interesting.
I am to the point where I don't know where I started and I don't know where I am going. Is there a song that goes like that? Oh well.
Basically if I had a tail I would just start chasing it right now cause that would have a clearer objective than anything else that I've done.
It is like Qual fever in Berkeley. Everyone is working on their Qual, except for me. I am just looking for a primary. In the mean time the chief thinks that when we met he actually gave me a solid project. So I'm going to have to meet with him and somehow make him think that he came up with whatever project I re-propose.

This feels really bad. The fact that everyone already has preliminary data and is putting their 3 aims together and all that. While I am just getting started. I basically need to get preliminary data within the next 2 months. Yet, here I am trying to figure out what it is exactly that I am going to be doing.


Quote of the year, "Well Dengue enters cells by receptor mediated endocytosis so it gets into the cytosol and then it does transcription so it produces RNA and then it produces DNA from there."

The month

Hello kitties,

What a month! So the project I was investigating is basically going down the toilet. And I am soooo super ready to flush it. I mean I am finally ready to let go of the project. So ready I am that for the last 3 weeks I've been searching for my official thesis project and I've been meeting with everyone and talking and reading and reading and reading and reading. I even attended a small symposium in Berkeley and then a talk in UCSF.
The good side of all this is that I am learning so many things about HIV. It feels good to be able to chat with the experts about what happens during infection at the immunological cell level as well as others. I have trying to find a project that fits into the Qual so that by the time I am done finding my thesis project I'll be ready to start writing the proposal for my Qual.
It has not been easy.
This weekend I had to go to Vegas to meet there with my in Laws who we have not seen for over a year. I actually ended up sleeping a maximum of 4 hrs. The sad thing is that it wasn't because I was partying, it was because I had to read! So I got up at 4:45 am and read until 10 am and then would go to breakfast with the in laws. It all sounds like torture but it was worth the sacrifice, to be able to hang with them and Carlos.

The reason why I am soooo anxious about all this?
1) I had to meet with the Chief this morning (originally scheduled for Monday).
2) I have to present in next week's lab meeting and I wanted to present the proposal to the lab then along with the horrible results from my current project.

So how did my meeting with the Chief go you ask... It went well despite the fact that he denied me permission to work on the project that I was proposing. He redirected me in a whole other way. I mean it is still within the playing field but....yeah..
So I still have a new project but now I have to read 1 million other papers inorder to be able to put it together for Quals and my Lab presentation.

With all the drama and exhaustive work that has been going on I haven't been paying attention to my family at all. I missed my mothers birthday and I still have not responded to my cousin's Christmas card or sent her a gift. I wish they could know how stressed out, suicidal, anxious I have been. At the same time I am DYING for a weekend away from this shit hole (grad student prison) with the family. DYING!

The growth of gray hair on my head has become exponential. I look like I am Albert Einstein's grand daughter... without the genius gene.