The "Bay Area"

If you are going to buy a place in California you might as well make a deal with the Devil so that he can get you a free pass to Heaven.
Obsiously the Devil wouldn't be the individual to consult on entries to Heaven. Well in the same way. You just don't come to LA or San Fran or oops "the Bay AREA" excuse me, to buy a home.

"A home? What? Why would you need that? Oh Jesus! Isn't that just Bad for Global warming?" Yes Bay Area People, this is what I think of you and your little over blown area.

I believe the first ultra polite thing they would say to me is, "Well if you do not like it why don't you just leave?" Instead of, Isa, let me show you the best thing about MY special area. Instead of I understand that housing here is crazy and it really isn't worth it but don't worry you'll find a place.
No, God forbid that you could be this nice understanding and helpful in "the BAY AREA"....

Well my answer to all of you "Bay Areans" is that I am STUCK IN YOUR STINCKING DIRTY HOLE!" ,because I am going to grad school here.
I mean I am not asking for much dammit. I am just asking for a place where I can sleep and live and study and be COMFORTABLE and not be paying 100 million dollars for it. And where I can take a decent crap without having to share the toilet with a stranger whom will charge me a quarter so that he can buy more CRACK!
The bay areans snicker at me when I talk about NYC. Well, let me tell you, in NYC I could pay for an apartment on my own, I could buy a home, I could go to cool restaurants of any kind. Whether that be Mexican, Puerto Rican, Vietnamese, Korean, whatever! But here all I find is Guacamole and Sushi, OOPS! I forgot that goes together.
My husband, whom has been waiting for the market to go below HELL so that prices here drop 1% is telling to say something positive about the marvelous, "Bay Area". Well here it is, at least there is an old long red bridge where you can throw yourself off of after foreclosing your home.
Then again there are many long bridges in New York and even in Florida, mind you not red.