Over it...

So I am not mad anymore. I don't care, I already set up another experiment and I expect this one will work best. BUT I just spent 3 weeks setting up this big experiment. I needed this experiment to tell me something, anything as long as it was SOMETHING. But in the end all of my cells died. Somewhere between day5 and day 10 the cells were dead.... And so the experiment didn't say anything.
I needed that experiment to work because pretty soon I have a department meeting/presentation. I need to show something that my lab hasn't seen. Something new something cool but simple. I got so upset on Monday that I took the day off yesterday. It wasn't so much the complaining whining and almost crying out of frustration, but that splitting headache that lets me know, if you don't stop if you don't relax you are going to end up in the emergency room. I went home, I stared at the TV like the zombie I can be and then the next day I woke up not wanting go to work. I mean I woke up and almost started crying again. So I didn't cry. I made breakfast and in the middle of breakfast I told Carlos that I wasn't going to go to work. Just like that I decided it. Thank God. It fitted perfectly cause there wasn't anything I had to get done that exact day.
It was a good day. The weather was breezy but not too cold. I stayed home reading a book til 1pm and then went to Anthropologie with Coffee. After Anthropologie, I took Coffee for a 1 hour walk on the bay and then came back home. We both fell asleep on the couch for a few hours as the day got colder and colder. I had planned to meet Carlos for dinner in San Fran but by the time I got enough energy to get up and call him it was already 7pm. So we ended up going to a restaurant on this side of the bay.
Nothing about science is easy. It is not easy to deal with scientists, to get ideas for projects or experiments, to get the experiment done perfectly 3 times with the same exact result, and it is not easy dealing with the stress this alone can cause.