Rotations...and other horrifying experiences

It is surprising that Universities actually let you do more than 1 rotation. It is even more surprising that we, the graduate students, actually stay after the first rotation.
A rotation is a 12 week period in which you engage in research in a particular lab of your choice and learn not only the techniques used in the lab but all the dirty secrets of the lab. You learn all the bad things about that professor all the bad and good things about the students and post docs. The problem with this set up is that usually the students of the lab scare the hell out of the rotating students and tell them the most horrifying secrets ever told on Earth.

I remember when I was working as a tech in other schools, the graduate and post docs of those labs would tell the incoming rotation students every single bad detail so that the new students would be completely disillusion and pick another lab. We always thought it was for the best of the rotating student. What we didn't realize is that this was happening to the student in all the other labs also. Imagine spending 12 weeks in 3 labs, thats a total of 36 weeks, with people telling you horrible things about those labs and then you having to choose which one is the lesser of the 3 evils. The lesser evil in which you will become a new slave to, for the next 6 years of your life.
Sigh....
When I applied here, I was so sure of which labs I wanted to rotate in. I knew which lab I wanted to stay in. I remember crying like a baby on my bathroom floor when I thought I would not get accepted to grad school, when I thought that I wouldn't be able to work in that lab....sigh. Things change my bloggies, things just change and there is absolutely nothing we can do about it cause we are nothing but graduate students, we are the scum eaten by the bacteria on the fungus on the mountain of feces in a field of cows. In another words we are nothing. We are powerless.

I am so sorry but I am ultra-depressed because I am in my second rotation and I am just not feeling the joy. At the same time I can't return to my first rotation because of the secrets.... the horrible secrets... "If you stay in this lab you are NUTS" (thats all I hear)

And then, at the same time I do not have any where else to go. I don't have another lab to rotate in. I am so scared. I am a graduate student without a home. I just want to go home. I want to be in a lab that I look forward to working in at 10 pm at night. I want to feel like I felt in my first rotation, yes the one I can't go back to.
For those of you that are confused: I loved my first rotation (the project, the students, even the pathogen) but I learned some secrets of the professor and the system of the lab that do not allow me to return. I just keep remembering one night in which I was doing a large prep (DNA extraction from a bacteria). It was 8 pm and then it was 9 pm and then it became 10 pm and I was fine in lab. A little tired but I was enjoying myself. There was another day in which I was in lab at 10 pm doing a western blot and I was happy. There was an earthquake that night and i was in lab, all by myself and I was completely happy.

Conclusion to this email: I am not happy when at 10 pm I all the sudden remember that in the morning I have to be in lab. I am not happy when I find myself in this new lab at 1pm. This is just not my home.